Anxiety! Answers?

It seems to define our culture, we live our lives fighting to control “It All” and fearing the “What ifs” if that control is lost.

i have felt it, my physical body responds to new and uncertain with “anxious” symptoms whether the unknown is a pending happy event or a devastating crisis. Continue reading

Good-Bye Clive ~ Blessed

God will either give us what we ask or give us what we would have asked if we knew everything he knows.  Timothy Keller  

We lost our 3 year old puppy this week. When we had to let our last two dogs go on the same day a few years ago our Blessing was heart broken. She often has said “I could not ever lose our Clive, I could not let another dog die mama.” Continue reading

So, you still have Fruit Flies !?!?

If your Fruit Flies are beating you at their game, there are a few additional tricks you may want to try. The tiny pests will find any source of sugar, vinegar or food waste and lay up to 500 eggs at one time to continue their life cycle in your home. As you put your traps out you will want to give a bit of additional attention to tidying up.

1.Keep the sink clean and free of dirty dishes. You may wish to pour some bleach down your drain to eliminate and eggs resting in the pumbing.

Dirty Dishes

Fruit Flies Love Dirty Dishes

2. All food needs to be sealed for a period of time. Any fly worth its weight in smarts will choose the fresh fruit over the vinegar trap any day, all day long.


Put the Fruit in a Baggie or the refrigerator

Fruit in our Fruit Stand

Fruit in our Fruit Stand, ziplocked

3. Take trash out often….take food waste straight to an outside can or tie it shut in a small bag before you drop in the kitchen trash.

Fruit Fly Promise Land

Fruit Fly Promise Land

4. Be a bit more diligent in keeping you kitchen surfaces wiped off. The pests will be happy with a dribble of honey, jam or fruit juice, you leave it, they will find it.

Additional Fun(ish) Tips

Use cute bottles to make the process less disgusting.

Upcycled fun bottles from Kaydra and Cody's Wedding

Upcycled fun bottles from Kaydra and Cody’s Wedding

Be silly, it is more fun, you could leave these out continually, dump the old trap with dead flies and replenish weekly.

Permanant Trap

Permanant Trap

I put these two traps on our counters 24 hours ago, it appeared we had beat the fruit fly problem, obviously they hide and infest even when you are not seeing a lot of them.

24 hours of Capture

24 hours of Capture

Brands and amounts don’t matter much.

Simple Fruit Fly Solution

Simple Fruit Fly Solution

Simple instructions on trapping the pests are in this post, click on the blue words.

An empty Amber Beverage bottle is perfect to hide the dead flies, plus you could just throw this away not requiring you to see the dead pests.

Amber Beverage Bottle

Amber Beverage Bottle

Blessed to walk the Broken Road

I had shared a bit of our specific challenges directly related to the life of an adoptive family, a very sweet and sincere friend responded “but all that  you share and write looks so precious.”

It is precious, pricelessly precious!

It is also hard, adoption results from broken and sad situations. Adoption is a beautiful redemptive plan our Lord has orchestrated for his little ones who have been abandoned, orphaned, wounded, neglected and rejected. Mothers have died, food has been scarce, starvation the norm, disease has wounded and hearts are fragile, so very fragil. It is a sensitive area for me to write about, we have a precious 11 year old who has to live with the image i paint for the world to see, it is her story and i need to protect her journey. i wish to blend the raw honest truth with the miraculous redemptive journey we walk.

If you are interested in the nitty gritty, The Connected Child is a must read. This book is a great resource for anyone who has adopted, is interested in adoption, loves someone who is adopted or cares about an adoptive parent.

A wound we process weekly is the deep feeling of abandonment, an ever haunting sense of being alone, different or left out. Today our girl had a volleyball game, i sat in the bleachers overwhelmed by the joy of watching our girl “belong”.  I am ever in awe of the God who took a very sick 12 pound toddler, lifted her from that orphanage crib and placed her in a community, family, school, neighborhood and fellowship where she is embraced and welcomed as “a part.”


That Number Two is our Blessing


“A part” of the team

IMG_3598 copy

They won Three out of Three

The girl can serve a mean ball

The girl can serve a mean ball

notice upper left corner

notice upper left corner

Our Bonus Blessing for the day, Busy Timmy at School.

Our Bonus Blessing for the day, Busy Timmy at School.

i hope to do a better job of sharing the Everyday Extraordinary Blessing that is ours because we are privileged to walk a Broken Road. If you feel the brokenness of this world listen and thank your Lord for his perfect plan.

Apparently California Fruit Flies are smarter than Wisconsin Fruit Flies

Fruit Fly.

Drosophila Melanogaster.

Vinegar Fly.

i hate them.

i was gone from home for 48 hours this weekend, Tim’s greeting as i entered the back door…“This place is swarming with Fruit Flies.” He was diligent in searching for the cause and found an apple core in a living room waste basket incubating the disgusting pests. We have talked at length about where food waste should be thrown, it is not in the living room waste baskets, but that is just how it goes around here.


So the whole point here is twofold besides the fact that misery loves company and i am the queen of loving companionship in my misery, which actually makes three points.

Point 1…if you hate Fruit Flies as much as i do you need to know that you can trap a passel of them with a simple mix of apple cider vinegar and a few drops of any liquid dishwashing detergent.

Fruit Fly Trap

Fruit Fly Trap

Pour a quarter cup of apple cider vinegar in any container, drizzle in a bit of dish soap and set this in the area of your infestation. By the next morning  you will have a disgusting collection of dead fruit flies. It may take a couple of days to eliminate all that have made your house their home, but they will come and they will die. 

One night's catch

One night’s catch

Unless of course you have California Fruit Flies….

It is so strange….Melissa has tried this many times. The last time Blessing and i were visiting, i used the exact same process that i use here at home….fruit flies completely ignore the vinegar traps in Los Angeles. I assume this is all due to some odd unknown species difference, they sure look and act like the midwest fruit flies i love to hate.

Besides being fascinated by this i have learned something from the behavior of the highbred California pest which brings me to point number two.

The vinegar trap process always, without fail, without exception works for me. As i have shared the fruit fly fix with Melissa it has not worked for her. In these differing results it would be easy for me to assume Melissa is doing it wrong, Melissa could assume i am not sharing accurately. Melissa may say, accurately… “it does not work! Dumb idea!” I might say…”it always works, you must be doing something incorrectly.”

I ponder, how much of my frustration in relationships might be as simple as this kind of misunderstanding.

How often do i know i am right and need to be right, while you know you are right and you can prove you are right, and if i am right, you must be wrong so we bicker and banter and hurt each other never coming to an understanding. It’s tough to come to an understanding when there is actually nothing to agree on. Sometimes what we are so very certain of just isn’t accurate from another’s perspective.

The next time i know what i know and i know that you are not getting it right, i pray i pause long enough to remember that not all vinegar flies are attracted to vinegar and the solution that always without fail works may not work for you in your area of need.

Just because something worked wonderfully in 1984 doesn’t make it the perfect solution for 2015.

What is a sure bet in Wisconsin may not work at all in California and no one will know why the difference exists.

Sometimes it is just the way it is, there is always another side to the story, another perspective to consider, there may be no route to agreement or understanding the situation.  It is for me to accept and trust, to believe the best and to give grace abundantly where differences are threatening to divide.

Additional Fruit Fly Trap Tips=Click Here.

Ten Years of Blessing

Ten years ago today Blessing and i returned from Liberia, Africa. We have several significant “Birthdates” for this miracle girl, we celebrate them all…

because she just calls for that kind of celebrating.

We are always awed as we stop and pause realizing what a gift it is that we were picked to be her mama and daddy. We are Blessed beyond measure by our Blessing.


The very first pictures we saw of our Blessing.


Very first images of our girl

Best big Auntie ever to 6 lucky littles

Best big Auntie ever to 6 lucky littles

Diva Junior Bridesmaid

Diva Junior Bridesmaid

Fitness-nutrition-running-warrior-dash-.jpg //

Love Her !!!!!

Photo Editing girl

Photo Editing girl


She loves to make the world laugh

10 years ago today

10 years ago today

Blessed by our Blessing

Blessed by our Blessing

first moments with both Mama and Daddy

First moments with both Mama and Daddy

So very Forever Thankful we were chosen to be her Mommy and Daddy. Every Day is a Blessing with this girl!!

So very Forever Thankful we were chosen to be her Mommy and Daddy. Every Day is a Blessing with this girl!!

It is one thing to say it, quite another to have to live it

My Blessing and i

My Blessing and i

i do not know all much, but i do know the one who knows all and i do know HE loves and cares enough to meet us right where we are and be all that we need in that moment.

i guess it wouldn’t  be fair if i wrote words like those and then didn’t have to live it.

i posted those words Thursday morning, Thursday afternoon i made a quick stop at the local dance studio and was complimented on our parenting skills ad nauseam, approximately 2.34 hours later my parenting confidence was shattered and i have fluctuated between anger, broken hearted and weeping mess for the past 4 days.

Years ago i was doing a bible study that posed the question…

List an attribute of your Lord and Saviour you treasure.

My answer…”His Faithfulness to give us the hard, he is not a Father who coddles and spoils, he asks us to give up our comfort and understanding that he may give us his best, i love that about My Lord.”

Mostly i have hated these past 4 days. i have found it hard to love anything about what the Lord is doing in my heart.  It stinks to hurt and it hurts to see our need and our child’s need.

If i am becoming confident of anything in my parenting journey it is this…

i have about 500 wedding pictures for once i learn how to do this

i have about 500 wedding pictures for you once i learn how to do this

Our 5 children were given to Tim and i for the refining of Tim and i. Each of them could have been wonderfully cared for in a million other homes, but he choose ours. Our Blessing would have been spared much pain if her Saviour had swept her into HIS arms and took her to Heaven from that orphanage crib, but he knew what Tim and i needed and He loved us too much to give us easy. He Blessed us with a Blessing that we could never have imagined when he gave us this sweet one. He is faithfully moment by moment reminding us of our need, our brokenness and our inability. i am painfully aware that i can not fix my child’s pain and brokenness. I can not figure it all out, i would default to “take the next step” except i don’t have any idea where to place my foot.

Which all leaves me very afraid and needing.

I wake at 4 am feeling deep vulnerability, i lay my hand on our precious child’s back and can only say “We need you Jesus, we need you!”

And that is where HE meets me, that is when my heart is willing to hear His whispered promises.

And they sang a new song, saying,

“Worthy are you,

for you were slain, and by your blood you ransomed people for God

   from every tribe and language and people and nation,

10 and you have made them a kingdom and priests to our God,

   and they shall reign on the earth.” Revelations 5:9-10

My Faithful Lord has bought our redemption with His precious son’s blood. He alone can figure this out, He has it all covered, He is worthy of my trust.

The Fatherless find their rest at the sound of your great name, the sick are healed at the sound of your great name. Please take a moment and click over to YouTube and soak in this hope that is ours.

Here is a link to a great reading detailing the hope and power in the truth of this song.

Our suffering is no surprise to our Loving Father…

Only let your manner of life be worthy of the gospel of Christ . . . not frightened in anything by your opponents. For it has been granted to you that for the sake of Christ you should not only believe in him but also suffer for his sake. Philippians 1:27–29

Paul told the Philippians that living worthy of the gospel of Christ meant fearlessness before enemies. Then he gave the logic of fearlessness.

The logic is this: God has given you two gifts, not just one — faith and suffering.

This challenge is a gift from our Loving Father, so is the Faith to live the challenge. You can read more here…God-Given Foes and Faith – devotional by John Piper

My heart still feels the physical ache of knowing how broken we are here in the Fish Pond. i still cry, a lot! But more importantly my heart Knows the ONE who knows it all. I know HIS son suffered that our girl might have healing and redemption. He is worthy of my trust, He is worthy of my obedience in taking the next step as i trust HE will direct where my foot lands. I will click these links, i will listen, i will read over and over, as many times as it take to renew this trembling heart and wondering mind of mine. i will model for my sweet Blessing today that He alone is worthy of our devotion and praise. I will rest in the only answer we need over here in our little pond.

His Great Name